Quips and quotes going back to the beginning of civilization have often focused upon the sometimes fraught and frustrating relationships between men and women. Whether we are discussing the hackneyed “Women are from Venus; Men are from Mars” tropes or the stereotypes about men being obliviously dim-witted and women being overly sensitive, a great deal of thought throughout many centuries has been devoted to the basic question of why men and women do not always get along.

The world we live in today is vastly different, and advances in technology have created new opportunities for building relationships (or finding a hookup), but little seems to have improved regarding the ability of men and women to find happiness with one another. If anything, the situation might never have been worse than it is today.

One obvious change is that our new age of gender fluidity has erased many of the traditional distinctions between men and women, which is a cause for celebration for some and a source of consternation for many others. Perhaps what were the rules and roles for thousands of years oppressed those who yearned for non-binary definitions of gender, but the reality on the ground is a lot of confusion that is making the already difficult business of finding true love a whole lot tougher.

Of course, our cynical and entirely functional approach to relationships today is yet another impediment. Romance seems to have receded from the plans of an astonishing number of incredibly jaded and disillusioned Americans, and fewer now marry, many more live alone, and grim practicality has replaced any possible hope for stars in the eyes when meeting that certain someone. None of this is new, but it is far more prevalent than used to be the case. 

True love is apparently now considered an illusion meant to snare the unwary, and one’s heart must be carefully locked away to avoid disaster. Sex is now either a commodity or a form of recreation for surprisingly many who cannot imagine chancing the level of trust and risk involved in falling in love—or at least somewhat in like—with another before exchanging bodily fluids.

There are, of course, still many, many Americans who have absented themselves from the supposed social and cultural advances of the past 50 years—and they are routinely derided by our smug intelligentsia. Men who go to work, care for their families, and embrace traditional male roles and responsibilities are castigated for their “toxic masculinity” and refusal to embrace our new gender norm of having no gender norms whatsoever. On the flip side, any woman who stays close to her home caring for children is ridiculed for being a “trad (traditional) wife” who is complicit with fomenting either a White Christian Nationalist racist agenda or the “Kinder, Küche, Kirche” (children, kitchen, church) mentality associated with the 19th century German Empire.

It’s a rough world out there for those who choose not to join the Gender Revolution being pushed in America today, and the media, academic, and governmental frustrations directed at those who refuse to bend to the will of the gender benders range from the mildly disapproving to the completely unhinged.

Old fashioned heterosexuality is apparently not very fashionable today. A great many educators, doctors, opinion makers, and government officials have loudly proclaimed recognizing the obvious reality that male-female sexual relations are the preferred mode of intimacy for the vast majority of Americans is a civil rights violation in and of itself. Therefore, every sub-variation of sexuality must be celebrated in movies, books, songs, laws, and bureaucratic decrees. Those who are disinclined to proclaim their allegiance to the new normal are, consequently, burned at the metaphorical stake for their apostasy regarding what is now deemed both acceptable and desirable to celebrate and teach to our children.

The crushing loneliness and unhappiness across America that strikes young and old alike, the declining rates of marriage, the continuing rise in sadly neglected children, the terrible increase in sexual violence and abuse, the skyrocketing use of prescription and non-prescription drugs to dull our pain, and the frightening efforts of so many to sexualize our young should be a warning sign that our society is pursuing a path certain to lead to self-destruction. 

When you get to the point where ostensibly responsible adults are arguing that castrating confused little boys and lopping the breasts off barely pubescent girls is a good idea, it’s time for an uncompromising look in the mirror.